01 September, 2007

“The Over-the-Shoulder Boulder Holder”

In “A Social History of the Bra” John Walsh writes:

The bra was invented by an engineer of German extraction called Onto Titzling in 1912. He was living in a New York boarding house, and one of his neighbours, a voluptuous opera singer called Swanhilda Olafson, complained that she needed a garment to hoist her vast bosom aloft every evening—so Titzling obliged, using some cotton, elastic and metal struts. Unfortunately, he failed to patent the device and, in the early 1930s, a Frenchman named Philippe de Brassière began making a suspiciously similar object. Titzling took him to court, but the unscrupulous Frenchman won the day. And that’s why the garment all the ladies are wearing is called a brassiere, not a titzling.

Ok, fine, you got it—that’s just a spoof history of the bra that Walsh begins with. But the rest of his article is quite the real deal. I’m a huge fan of brazen Minoans.

Oh, and if it’s science you want and not history, there’s trusty old Wikipedia for enlightenment. On their page for ‘Brassiere’, they have a section called ‘Mechanical Principles‘:

A pair of breasts can weigh several kilograms. For instance a pair of “D cup” breasts may weigh 15–23 pounds (7–10 kg), dependent on band and cup size. One of the principal functions of a bra is to elevate and “support” the breasts, that is, to raise them from their normal position lying against the chest wall. The bra’s shoulder strap should bear little weight. This is considered the defining characteristic of the bra: supporting the weight from the back and shoulders, as opposed to lift from below (as corsets do).

Over-reliance on the platform (backstrap) for support will lead to undue compression of the breasts, so much of the weight tends to be carried by the shoulder strap, particularly for larger breasts. The major engineering weakness of the bra is that it acts as a pulley, transferring the weight of the breasts from the lower chest wall to higher structures such as the back, shoulder, neck, and head. This can result in pain and injury in those structures, especially for women with pendulous breasts.

Girls, also pay special attention to health problems that can result from wearing a bra that is the wrong size. Consult a consultant if necessary.

Ahem.